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grimelords:

Telling the substitute teacher the wrong names: a classic. Telling the substitute teacher you are so old and born again every day, that ten thousand names could never define you, that you’re a shadowed mass swirling forth from jupiter, that your father is time and your mother is death, that you’ll swallow any scream of hers as you grow larger and ever larger: a super classic, king of the school, no homework ever.

(via emraebeck)

richwhitelesbian:

powerdad bellows at his son “TIME FOR BED!” rowdy son says “no dad fuck off” powerdad starts bench pressing his son till hes dead and then it is always bed time

(Source: finalfantasyfootball, via cockstiiel)

hannahcarbons:

kyleboy21da:

theletterwsarseflap:

awkwardbirds:

rinlockhart:

ridiculously-dilettantish:

strange-is-a-compliment:

I always wanted these to happen in real life

Where is “Several bad puns later”?

we need more!

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Spongebob time cards are solid gold.

(via snazzygoku)

sometimesyoureyoung:

spoken-not-written:

the next time you think you’re lonely, just remember you have about 25 billion white blood cells in your body protecting your sorry little ass with their life. you have 25 billion friends who would die for you. no need for tears.

I actually needed that. 

(via snazzygoku)

asksecularwitch:

drumstyx:

hebbycakes:

transetheralbrimwylf:

hexgoddess:

That’s brilliant I need to wear shorts under skirts

That disappointed gif might be my new fav.

THANK YOU ANIME GIRL

I love this for criticizing the constant panty shots in anime. Brilliant

At this point, I’ve had so many people upskirt me that at this point I always wear shorts or thick leggings under skirts.

So….This is normal for me.

(Source: torana90, via dbzreblog)

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